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Are you sharing your fluids?

Being Fluidly Bonded

What: Fluid bonded, what does the term mean anyways? It’s that moment in a relationship when you and your partner(s) decide to remove barrier method from sexual activities. That moment when you and your partner(s) have come to a mutual understanding that, y’all are only going to exchange bodily fluids with each other (unless you’re poly and all partners are in an agreement as to who is fluidly bonded to who). It’s a big step in a relationship because in essence you are putting your life into your partner’s hand and vise versa. That’s a BIG DEAL, and nothing to ‘play with’. I can’t tell you how long you should wait before having this discussion with your partner, because no two relationships are the same.

How:  How to have this conversation with your partner, and how to move forward? Be open and honest and have the conversation when you are clear headed, and not in the heat of the moment. Ask your partner what they think about the idea and go from there. If y’all are deciding to move forward and become fluid bonded each member of the relationship needs a complete hiv/sti testing. For some the initial test/result period is enough to give the green light into being fluidly bonded, for some they choose to wait 6 months (the incubation period before some sti show up positive in the system) after the initial testing and then get tested again, being sure to continue to use a barrier method until after the second set of testing. Again it’s about personal choices and mutual decision. What is your life value to yourself, and your partner(s)? Once you are in a fluid bonded relationship, I would still recommend yearly testing for you and your partner(s), it shows you care about their life and your own. If you or your partner decided to continue to use barrier method, that’s ok too. The relationship is still valid whether or not it is fluid bonded or not.

What does being fluid bonded mean to you?

Tia Evans, LCSWA, MSW

Buying Condoms!

In all my years in the game, I’ve never bought condoms, yet alone be in the store while my partner buys them. So as I’m typing these words I’m doing it, and it’s somewhat embarrassing! But hey I’d rather the world know I’m having safe sex than to know I’m out here raw dogging lol. I can only imagine what teenagers go thru. SMH

Good Dick Will Imprison You!!


Recently I just had to cut this guy outta my life. Why you may ask? Because I was DICKMATIZED and didn’t even know it. Now I know what you may be thinking, what is dickmatized? Dickmatized is when you get dicked down sooooo well it makes you go stupid. Literally it makes you wanna lose your mind. Kinda like being whipped. It makes you wanna abandon your friends, and just eat sleep and breathe the dick. Anyways, this happened to me. Unfortunately four years later I started catching feelings and I expressed those feelings to him. His response was, ‘well act like it’. Basically he wanted me to chase him.


Not happening. Maybe the insecure me would’ve done so years ago, but I’m not into the chasing game anymore. So today I blocked him from my Facebook and Instagram and blocked him in my phone. It’s bittersweet but I’ll feel better in the long run. I guess what I’m trying to say is ladies, don’t let the dick drive you crazy, or make you lose yourself. Don’t be like me because I was pure-t


Tia Evans, MSW

Sex Education

Alexithymia - difficulty in experiencing, expressing, and describing emotional responses.

There is a silence surrounding the subject of sex in our society. This is the reason why people, from professional public speakers to desperate wannabes on random YouTube ads announce ‘SEX’ at the beginning of their bad speeches in order to be able to get anybody’s attention. Our ‘Asian Values’ have somehow given us Victorian sensibilities, so that we shroud the discussion of normal bodily functions in shame and secrecy, and children continue to ask their mamas who bore them without ever getting a reply. Most of the time, any attempts on these sensitive subjects are silence with one-liners like ‘sin’ or ‘haraam’ and in the process, our parents become hypocrites as they demonize the very act that brought us – their gifts of joy – to them. People think that teaching sex ed somehow means that we’re going to end up as sex-crazed maniacs, forgetting that a good proportion…

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Society’s hang ups and cultural differences.

Rantings of an Aussie Geek.

Society has many hang ups about many different subjects. They vary from country to country though.

I find it odd that as a society we take great measures to protect children (I mean that in this case as anyone under adult age) from anything we deem sexual but violence is only mildly limited. Basically it seems to be okay as long as it isn’t too gory. Now I don’t propose showing kids hardcore fucking/fetish stuff. I think we should treat violence worse than the sexual stuff as far as children are concerned.

I’m sure I had more stuff in mind when I wrote a note to do a blog post about this but I forgot what else I was going to write about. So apologies for the short blog.

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